Borat At Parklane, Theater Of The Bros
The minx went to see Borat last night and walked away pleased. Since it wasn’t playing at the Riverside, I had to slum on down to Parklane to catch the show. And when I say slum, I’m not referring to the neighborhood surrounding Parklane–I’m referring to the theater itself and the audience it attacks. I might see one film a year at Parklane for several reasons. First, most of the movies I want to see are playing at the Riverside and I would much rather see them there because its a nicer, more comfortable theater. Parklane has seen better days. The seats are starting to show their age, they’re uncomfortable and there is absolutely no legroom in the aisles. And the only people that can successfully navigate their way down the aisles (between rows) without shoving their ass or crotch in the faces of their fellow movie goers are toddlers and anorexic teenage girls the size of Nicole Richie. I haven’t actually seen this happen, but I’m sure many a person, after returning from the snackbar with a bag of popcorn the size of basketball of course, has fallen into the laps of those seated in the row of seats below after tripping over the feet of those in their own aisle. But I have to be honest, its really the Parklane crowd that keeps me away. The minx never pretended she wasn’t an elistist–particularly in the case of movies. Parklane attracts more than its share of open mouth popcorn chompers, during movie talkers (or shouters depending on the movie), candy wrapper crinklers, and, the absolute worst of all, sqeauling, wheezing children.
Last night was no exception although with a movie like Borat, a rowdy crowd can actually enhance the experience, however, I am always against popcorn chompers, wrapper crinklers and wheezing children. Humiliating is not the word to describe the feeling I had while having to wait in line for the 9:50pm show. It was me and fifty teenage “Bro” aspirants. What’s a “Bro” you ask? According to Skinnie magazine and my own observations, Bros are dudes that combine Eminem bragaddacio and charm and Nevada Badssness. They spend all their money on huge trucks that push the state’s 24 inch bumper limit while wearing a bandana AND a baseball hat with the bill cocked to side, and if they’re really cool, black knee socks with their overlong, cutoff shorts. They seldom wear sleeves with shirts (Bros in Reno are an exception to this in winter), often wear an assortment of piercings and tatoos and of course call each other “bro.” Sometimes they have girls with them, “brohos,” dressed in various hoodies covering revealing tanks, skinny jeans, doing their best to look like all fake tough like Ashlee Simpson. My god–it was all I could do not to run out of the theater in search of the nearest ballroom dancing class. Remembering it still makes me shiver with horror.
But I digress–back to Borat. I’m not going to say much except that its a hilarious movie. I hestitate to say its a good a mockumentary as Spinal Tap for instance, and their really different animals anyway. I will say that its a genius commentary on American gullability, good will, and intolerance–all at the same time. One scene in particularly illustrated this for me. When Borat attends a dinner party in Texas to practice his etiquette, his hosts don’t throw him out of the house when he calls one of the women at the table ugly, they don’t throw him out when he returns from a visit to the bathroom with his poo in a bag. Nope, they throw him out when he invites a black prositute over. That was the tipping point. Americans will make a lot of allowances for cultural difference, but being presented with a black sex-worker is much worse than being presented with a bag of poo.
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The Park Lane theater has “seen better days” and “starting to show [its] age”? Wow. That makes me feel old, and I’m only 30. I still vividly remember shopping at the Weinstocks that used to be on the site. And I thought the Park Lane theater was newer than the Riverside. Have they really let it go that badly?
Bros are nothing new, though. I roomed with one at college. Back then they were known as “brah”s.
Parklane may be kind of run down from hard use, but the last time I saw a movie at the Riverside, the theater smelled. It’s time to rip out those carpets, Century. They’re beyond any cleaning technology that exists today.
I would add ignorance to your list of gullability, good will, and intolerance. It was funny in parts, but it was still like watching a 2 hour long Ali G episode.
I am touched by the fondness for Parklane exhibited here. Yes, I definitely left out ignorance. The last 20 minutes were a bit slow…The scenes that were most disturbing to me where with the frat boys in the RV. “Never let a women make you what you are!” Like your mother you drunken asses?
The Riverside is the newest theatre in Reno. Century Parklane and Century Sparks opened within a year of eachother in 1997 & 1998 respectively.
FWIW, I haven’t noticed any maintenance issues with any of the theaters. If you think the leg room is bad at Century Parklane, you either didn’t live here 10 years ago or don’t remember how bad it was at the Century domes. Your knees literally touched the back of the seat in front of you. If someone tried to lean back in their seat they would bang into your knees. After watching Titanic there my legs were so numb and stiff I could barely walk.
As far as the demographic that Century Parklane seems to attract, I could not agree more w/ Myrna’s observations. It’s one reason I avoid that place like the plague. The other being the fact that my car was broken into there a few years back.
Oh yeah, and I can’t wait to see Borat. Looks hiarious!
Just saw Borat and yes I DID laugh myself dizzy. So did most of the audience.
BTW, I think that dinner party scene was shot in a suburb of Birmingham AL, not Texas.
One last note, I hope you all enjoy watching commercials. Now that Century is owned by Cinemark all Century Theatres have begun playing commercials. So far it hasn’t been too bad. Just a lame Coke commercial and short film. That was one thing that set Century apart from the rest of the theatre chains.
I may be scarred for life. The wrestling scene has been permanently etched into my cerebral cortex. One question: I sat a few rows away from a “brah/bro” who was more than just a little smashed and stupidly loud. Who’s watching the door at Century these days?
I can’t wait to see “Borat”; we haven’t had a really great comedy at the movies since “There’s Something About Mary”, but if the buzz is to be believed this one may break the streak.
Haven’t seen “Borat” yet but will. I had to laugh when I read your thoughts on Parklane. I love the Riverside so much it took me two weekends to get myself over to Parklane to watch “Running With Scissors”.
It’s not “fondness” for Park Lane, exactly, it’s just that in my mind it’s still a brand-new theater. The two Centuries and the Riverside (which was built by Regal) are so new that they can’t be falling apart yet. When I think of dusty old crappy theaters, I think of the Century Mystery House (the domes), the Old Town Cinemas, and the Greenbrae 8. I used to live in Greenbrae 8.
I guess I’m still living in the Reno of the 90s. It’s a good thing I’m not older, or this is where I’d start going on about how great the Granada Theater was.
I may have been exaggerating about the threadbareness of the seats….maybe they just seem worn out because I don’t like the theater as much.