The Nevada Presidential Caucus FAQ
I couldn’t let this go by without having a little fun. I found it on which I found on Nye — Gateway to Nevada’s Rurals blog the other day. I give you the minx’s Nevada Caucus FAQ!
What is a caucus?
A caucus is a completely chaotic and disorganized process by which Nevada Democrats will select their nominee for the presidency. Basically, everyone is directed into a large venue where they mill around for hours trying to find out what precinct they belong to and where that precinct meets. Then you spend a few more hours with other members of your precinct yelling and stomping your feet and wishing there was an open bar. Finally, whoever is the most obnoxious Democrat in your precinct gets a chance to compete against other blowhards to represent you and your neighbors (no doubt very badly) at the national convention in Denver next year.
What a caucus is not:
A caucus is not a primary election. There is also no open bar or smoking allowed. It is not an orderly or organized process.
What happens at a caucus?
Nobody really knows but zillions of breathless journalists from all over the country will be asking participants insightful questions like “What is your stance on legalized prostitution” and “Where is the open bar? I thought because this caucus was in Nevada, I could at least get a drink.”
How is the caucus done?
No frickin’ idea. Don’t let anyone tell you differently–even those corn-fed bozos from Iowa the state party imported fly by the seat of their pants every four years.
How is the caucus done?
One hopes its done well but who the hell knows with this crew in charge. Seriously, its all about candidate viability. All that needs to be determined is who the Culinary Union is going to endorse. Otherwise, forget about any other candidate surviving the process besides Clinton. However, if Edwards wins the Iowa Caucus and is endorsed by the Culinary Union, a major surprise could be in order.
How Is Viability Determined?
Unless you’re there do you really care? He or she with the most support from the obnoxious precinct delegates wins.
Why is Nevada so important now?
Beats me. OK, really, its because Harry Reid says so. Be sure and tell Chris Matthews that when he asks you the same question. Otherwise, most people are going to assume its because prostitution is legal here.
Where will my caucus be held?
In a dim, dark, smelly auditorium in most cases. At least the caucus is in January, otherwise you’d have to add “sweltering” and “sweaty” to that list of adjectives.
What does it feel like to go to a caucus?
Pervert.
Is there a way to vote early or cast an absentee vote?
No, you must attend the event held in your requisite dim, dark, smelly auditorium.
Does it cost anything to participate?
Its going to cost the state Democratic party A LOT, but you can participate in the chaos for free!
Who Can Attend a Precinct Caucus?
Anyone who is a registered Democrat in Nevada can participate but any bum off the street can attend.
Who Can Participate?
Hasn’t this been covered already? Jeez. If you must know, please attend a “mockus.”
How Are Delegates Elected?
I don’t do math but division is involved–possibly long–and rounding. Ouch.
Resolution Discussion
This is where any doofus can propose any kind of stupid change to the state party platform and their precinct members have to, you know, entertain them.
I can’t wait till January.
Similar Posts:
- Nevada Caucus Popular Vote Total
- Court Rules Against Nevada Teachers’ Lawsuit: Caucus Is Still On
- Well That Was Fun
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But will Nevada Dems really have a say?
A friend of mine described the all-the-rage “mockus caucus” is all about pizza selection fer chrissakes! If you want to see something dumm-’n-dummer than this go check out the latest from the head cheezes in D.C. http://www.democrats.org/page/content/partybuilder/
January ‘08? Naw, I’m holding out for January ‘09!
Wonder how many more troops will die or be wounded for life between now and then?